Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

DON'T TOUCH MY DUCK, IT HAS A ONE DOLLAR BILL

yo mama just like a toilet, white and full of crap!

A walks out of a bar and the joke is cut off by a-

Why did the duly oppressed individual where sunglasses? Because the sun was bright.

What do you get when you cross scabies with genital warts? Krusty Krabs.

what do you call a mexican with a rubber blanket cold

What kind of parrot can't mimic human voices? One that's just had it's vocal chords illegally harvested and sold on the black market

Q:Whats big, red and eats rocks? A: A big red rock eater

Donald Trump

Why did the young boy cross the road? because his dad beats him due to alcoholism and his mother is a crack whore.

whats worse than a worm in your apple..? getting shot..

i homeless man asked for ome change. he didnt get any because people were afraid he would spend it on drugs

Why does my friend pick up garbage? Because he is a garbageman.

What's the difference between a black man and and a bag of crap? A lot, but mostly the bag

What did the homeless man get for Christmas?... A warm meal, a shower, and a place to sleep courtesy of the local homeless unit.

1)Did you hear about the sick juggler? 2)No... 1) He just couldn't stop throwing up!!!! 2)Oh no!! Is he ok?? 1)He's dead. 2)HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA c&h

An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

The anti joke that repeats itself :(

moonshine most none americans think its just when the moon shines we have another story

A depressed man walks into a bar. He has a drink and heads back to his apartment. On the way he was killed by another man attempting to commit suicide due to depression.

jews

How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? She said she can do 3

A bunch of kids are in a treehouse. The treehouse falls out of the tree and kills everyone in the treehouse and the two little girls playing underneath. It was sad.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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