Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because the weather report said there was a 90% chance of rain, and he didn't want to get his posh new coat wet on the way to the studio

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What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

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Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

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I'm sorry but your child seems to have fractured his spinal column and can no longer control any part of his body below his neck.

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what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

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What is a 3 legged dog? It's still a dog! Sheesh

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Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

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Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? I don't know what they said, but one muffin, had a knife.

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How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

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I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one . Though , I do have cancer .

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what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

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What's worse than falling out of a tree and landing on a dog? Rape.

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What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

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Who's the slut of the alphabet? C.

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So a guy walks up to a gay guy and says: "You are a fag." The gay guy says: "That is very offensive, you jerk." So the guy says: "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know what it meant" and the gay guy says: "I accept your apology." Then the gay guy crosses the street and gets hit by a bus

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Why did the gay man sneek out of the brothel? Because he was ashamed of his well paying reception job

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You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

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What's the best thing about twenty three year olds? there are twenty of them

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How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, unless he's short. Then, he'll need a friend to hold the ladder for him.

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Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

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The awkward moment when you find your wife on the online dating site you are on.

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What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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