Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

y was John so sad becaus his mom took his phone

If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

What do black people do with M&Ms? They eat them.

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

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A man and a six year old boy are walking along a path through the woods on a moonless night. "Gee mister, I'm scared!" says the boy. "You're scared?" says the man. "I have to walk back alone!"

alex and clayton are having sex at school. at that point, their teacher walks in and tells clayton about the dangers of unprotected sex.

What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

Knock Knock. Erm, sorry to be weird, but can you perhaps use the doorbell, because it's new and has a novelty chime. I'm proud of it and get a little chuckle everytime it rings in the vain hope that, perhaps you, the visitor, may also find it entertaining. Who's there anyway?'

Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because humans do not have the capability of accessing the chickens brain to receive their knowledge and what they were thinking about in the past.

What did Elmer Fudd say when Bugs Bunny got away again? "Oh, dat dawn wabbit, I'ww get it some day".

why was the 6 year old boy crying? his mother had just passed away from terminal cancer and his stepdad caught him crying so he kicke hm in the face and told him to man up.

Why can't hank swim? Hank is a rock.

Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your boyfriend's gay

Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

Knock Knock! Who is there? Me. Let me in. Oh, okay, Come in.

What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

What's wore then finding a worm in your apple? Being the only person to survive a plane crash over Alaska, then having to eat your family in order to stay alive waiting for help to come.

A man walks into a bar He's an alcoholic and it's ruining his family

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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