The neighbours challenged me to a water fight so I am updating Anti jokes while i let the kettle boil.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

sky silverstein

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse than hitting your funny bone on a chair............... Hearing one person say "its friday" then realizing that you are now singing

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A skeleton walks into a bar. He orders a beer and a mop.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Bye, Ax... Nerochan, you just gonna leave me in this state? I mean wont you stop it? I know hypnosis and all but I mean I have like black belt in hypnosis but since you began it, I do not really want to stop it.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Verbal assault; because battering someone to death with a dictionary has never been so much fun. [L]

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did they serve Swiss cheese at the church? It was lunchtime.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: What's worse than eating cauliflowers? A: Eating cauliflowers and getting raped by Jerry Sandusky at the age of 7.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the girl with a striped ball fall over? She was a victim of a drive-by shooting.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Parents are very similar to trees. They fall over when hit repeatedly with an ax.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock Knock Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

RACIST JOKE: how to start a footrace in ghana role a donut down a hill

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Finding this website has distracted me and has taken up a large majority of my time.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you stop a black person from drowning?.. Take your foot off his head

thumb_up thumb_down -8

He I just met you, and this is crazy, but you sister just died here's her baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

this guy didnt get any pussy last night so go easy on him I I I V

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock Knock! Who's there? John Simons. This joke lacks a punchline. Yes, yes it does.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you stop a dog from digging up your garden? Every time it does so, shout at the dog so it knows it has misbehaved. Keep doing this and the dog will eventually understand the error of its ways.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red violets are purple what the hell happened to your ugly face

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why didn't the girl's ring fit? She had no fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops