What do you get when you cross a spider with a cow? A dead spider.

Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

Golf.

"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

Naturally us at the order of exile, the ones that learn and teach the ways of Nero do not exist. Soon neither will those that speak against us. - Azure Dragon

Why was the black man eating fried chicken and watermelon? He was at home

Knock Knock Whos there Me Oh, come in

What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

Why is the chicken on the road? Cuz he died trying to get to the other side.

. . I am a whale

How many easily offended people does it take to change a light bulb? Shut up, that's not funny!

can you pass the soap?

What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

Roses are red Violets are blue I love you so much That is a an example of the 2nd person and the identification of plants and their colors

Spongebob. "Hey Patrick, I thought of something funnier than 24." Patrick "Let me hear it." Spongebob "25"

there was this kid who was perfectly well-adjusted, had most normal things a person needs and a generally good life. what did he get for Christmas. non-hodgkins lymphoma.

Peaches eat leaches, that is why sneaches live on beaches.

What did john say to bob Hey bob

what did the grandma do after she was pushing up daisies? washed her hands because gardening is a dirty activity

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

What does a black person and ebola have in common? They both kill people

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Hearing the same holocaust joke seventeen times.

My friends and family all recommended me for alcoholics anonymous, but all i had to say is that my father didn't raise me to be quitter.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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