Why did the chicken cross the road? He did it for fitness.

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what's the difference between a pound of liver and vomit? £3.24

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What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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Hurr durr, I shit my pants.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist bastard.

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My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

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What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

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why did Kanye interrupt Taylor Swift at the VMA's? because he had a little too much scotch before the ceremony

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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Q: What did the police officer tell the man without a shirt on? A: Put a shirt on.

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whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

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Stacey has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Stacey.

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A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

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Why did the Black man buy some slaves? They were his family

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Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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A cheerio gets a job at McDonalds and after working for a while, he gets employee of the month and goes to the district ball. While there, he meets a female(frosted) cheerio whom he asks out. She refuses because she only dates frosted cheerios. So, the male goes back to work for the next year, and his boss is happy with his work, so he asks him if he would like anything. The cheerio says yes, i want to be frosted. The boss says ok, i'll make you frosted, so now that he's frosted, he goes back to the ball. He asks the same female cheerio out, she says yes this time. He then asks her if she wants something to drink, she says yes. She wants some milk. So the guy stands in line for about 15 minutes, when he gets to the front, there is no more milk left. So he asks her if she would like some tea. she says yes. So he goes and stands in line for another 15 minutes only to find out there is no more tea. So then he asks her if she would like some punch, shesays yes. So after an hour of searching, he finds out there is no punchline......

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What do you call a man with a spade stuck in his head? An ambulance, he may be in need of urgent medical assistance

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why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

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What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

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What did the dinosaur say to the koala? Nothing because the dinosaur is extinct and both of which cannot talk.

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knock knock, who's there me me who he opens the door a kills yo

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

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A Stoner sees a bag of chips.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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