Q: Why were there four married men in one room without their pants on? A: because it was the mens bathroom.

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my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

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What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

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Hey look i just made a jo... shit.

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A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

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What's nappy,brown,intoxicated,and stealing my bike? A Blazed, black guy that stole my bike.

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If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

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What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

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Q: Why did princess Diana crops the road? A: Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt

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A farmer accidentally trips his wife. She falls down the stairs and the farmer is quickly arrested for murder.

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You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

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Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

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A man walks into a bar. After recovering, he sues the bar for it's irregular glass doors.

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Is your refrigerator running? I hope so, or else the food will go bad!

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An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Turk, a German, an Indian, several Americans (including a southerner [but certainly not a redneck!], a New Englander, and a Californian), an Argentinian, a Dane, an Australian, a Slovakian, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Moroccan, a Frenchman, a New Zealander, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Guatemalan, a Colombian, a Pakistani, a Malaysian, a Croatian, a Uzbek, a Cypriot, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Chinese, a Sri Lankan, a Lebanese, a Cayman Islander, a Ugandan, a Vietnamese, a Korean, a Uraguayan, a Czech, an Icelander, a Mexican, a Finn, a Honduran, a Panamanian, an Andorran, an Israeli, a Venezuelan, a Fijian, a Peruvian, an Estonian, a Brazilian, a Portuguese, a Liechtensteiner, a Mongolian, a Hungarian, a Canadian, a Moldovan, a Haitian, a Norfolk Islander, a Macedonian, a Bolivian, a Cook Islander, a Tajikistani, a Samoan, an Armenian, a Aruban, an Albanian, a Greenlander, a Micronesian, a Virgin Islander, a Georgian, a Bahamanian, a Belarusian, a Cuban, a Tongan, a Cambodian, a Qatari, an Azerbaijani, a Romanian, a Chilean, a Kyrgyzstani, a Jamaican, a Filipino, a Ukrainian, a Dutchman, a Taiwanese, an Ecuadorian, a Costa Rican, a Swede, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Swiss, a Greek, a Belgian, a Singaporean, an Italian, a Norwegian and 47-53 Africans walk into a fine restaurant. Fortunately," said the snooty maître d', "we'll let you come in without a Thai.

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Did you hear the joke about the man and the serial killer? Neither did the man since he was stabbed repeatedly and thrown into the bottom of a lake.

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Why was the little boy sad? Both of his parents died in a tragic car accident.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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