Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

How do you get a blond out of tree? Shoot her in the head.

My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

What's fat and round and has a ballsack nose? Mr Chicken

Q) What did the Irishman get for his birthday? A) Drunk

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

What's the sexiest thing on a farm? It depends on what you find sexy, and your personal perception of a farm.

Why did the chiken cross the road? It didn't, J-walking is against the law.

Why do people make fun of Laquesha? Because she's white.

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

your momma's so fat that she weighs a lot

Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

Why is this the worst joke ever? Because it isn't even funny.

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo "who"? Boo Radley. I live down the street.

Hey do you have a suitcase? Why? I need one.

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? hit him in the head with an axe

Q.What did the homeless kid get from santa? A. Play Doe. Because he was a good boy. Q.what did the Rich Kid get form santa? A Coal. Because he was a bod boy. The rich kid then got mad and threw the coal at the homeless kid hitting him on the head which killed him of enturnaly bleeding.

A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

Why was six afraid of 7? Because 7 was a terrorist.

what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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