Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

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A young boy walked in on his mom and dad in their room lastnight They were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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a black guy walks into a bar and sits next to a white guy. White guy: "I don't like your kind here". Black guy: "what kind wound that be"? White guy: "the colored kind". The black guy turns away then looks back at the white guy and says", When I'm born I'm black, when I die I'm black, When I'm cold I'm black, and when I'm sick I'm black. You ( to the white guy ) when your born your pink, when you die your blue, when your cold your purple, and when your sick your green and your calling me colored???

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a man walks into a bar... he was shot to death because he was a slave during the 1910s

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Scenario: Two guys are out hunting. Two guys are walking and a one falls down. The other calls 911 and the guy still standing asks what to do. The person at the hospital told him to make sure his friend was dead, then heard a gunshot. The guy who called said "Now what do I do?"

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What's white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? A refrigerator.

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Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

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How do you kill a Chinese hobo Shoot him

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jack be nimble jack be quick jack is a parapeligic.....there's no need for more

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Lil Wayne

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Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

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Q: Why did the boy have blue balls? A: because the respectable girl with high self esteem refused to give him head.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupter. Interrupter who? Interrupter Jones.

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I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

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What's red and every where? A bloody soldier who just stepped on mine.

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why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

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Why was it cold in Florida on Monday? Because there was an irregular cold front moving through. The Monday part was just a coincidence.

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Gay people: "Quit calling Justin Bieber gay, we don't want him either."

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Why wasn't the elephant allowed to the pajama party? Because he didnt have any pajamas.

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If you have three ice-cream cones, and you give away two, how many do you have left? Why would you give away your ice-cream? Eating it is the better option.

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Who is big and stupid My brother

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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