What did Helen Keller name her dog? Max

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Why did the skeleton cross the street. He didn't.

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Q. Whats black and red all over? A. A black wall thats been painted red.

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Roses are red,I love the walking dead,but if they kill off Darrell ill watch glee instead

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What did the farmer say to little susie? I have a gun. Get in the car and dont scream or i will kill you

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How do you get your lawyer to shut up. Hit him with a bat.

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When is it unlucky to see a black cat? When you are a mouse.

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Yo mumma so poor that she dosent have any money

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Why was the boy crying? Because he was told he would never find a wife

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Roses are red violets are blue monkeys like you belong in the zoo but don't be afraid I'll be there to that in the cage but laughing at you

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Jewish guy walks into a bar. He owns the place.

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How do you get a person to jump off a cliff? You push them.

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''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

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Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

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Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

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Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

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knock knock - whos there whos there -"im confused" try it on someone

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Me John Kasich! Me win Ohio primary!

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Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

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What did the Atheist say in church? His best friend's eulogy.

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Scenario - Two astronauts are kayaking down the Sahara dessert. Question - How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse? Answer - Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

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Uh... No? Listen, the other 2 people that bother using this "site" (excuse for one) would not give a damn, and if some world government are after us they wont find shit. What? If I said no you would hack this site? My mother can hack this site, thats what makes it so useful for us... SO PLEASE DO NOT TELL EEEEEEEEEVERYONE THAT MY MORALS AND SHIT ARE ALL CODES THAT NOBODY HAS THE BRAIN TO DECODE PLEASE <<<<<<<<< *Sarcasm detector goes off* Seriously though, nah, dont hack nor delete anything, I kinda like how I got some thumbs ups on the comment section where I shared about my mother finally dying and me feeling the world against me great etc blahblah, "Erica" and "Wizard" thumbed those up and are now with us (seriously Wizard? Geek somebody?)

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A black guy, a Latino guy and an Asian guy all walk in a bar. What do they all have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantaloupe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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