- Anti Joke

Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

What did the kid with no arms get for his birthday? A sock puppet.

What's worse then a missed call from your dad? A missed call from your mom.

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How did Jesus walk on water? Jesus is God in the form of a man, and he is the only human being ever with the ability to perform miracles

Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

Q: How did the man walk across the road? A: With his own 2 feet!

Why did the penis cross the road? Because a man was humping the chicken

My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck.

The last head of Satan, is oh but what you blamed upon Your faults, Your sins. The thoughts of Madness written here, yet potent enough to cloud Your thoughts.... Wait not forever children of man, as eternity is at its peak, the false prophet IS AMONGST US! But what side is he on? The last ditch attempt to protect humanity from a raging jealous vengeful God? Say it is not so! Say that darkness is not the only thing standing against you and eternal damnation... ...Yet you killed his only true child, you stole his name, his essence... Even his Identity... ...Even the Angels white are powerless to stop him, Your maker, Your true maker, for what is the grief of the holy, from which you took his only son... ...As you celebrate once and once anew... :...Merry CHRISTmas, to all of those of you all now left behind... Celebrate it well, as before the world reaches 2017, is where it all ends...

Whats worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

Dr.Octagonapus.... BLAAAAAArGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jackalope :)

Have you heard of the Armenian genocide? No? Me neither.

im trying to thing of a good joke...oh wait i got one but only one... ok ready?...oh wait...i forgot it again

There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

why are some people black? Because god decided there needs to be different people in the world therefore none are congruent

Why didn't gram-pa give his grandson a Birthday present? Because he had Alzheimer's and forgot about him.

What did rangler get on anti joke? Thumbs down.

If you just read this, You're dead.

Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

AntiJoke will not let me type this so I will add some spaces. N I G G E R.

Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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