What's white and smells like crap? An albino tird. Just kidding, Justin Biebers music.

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Lebron James got a new iPhone, but he has to keep it on vibrate because he doesn't have any rings.

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kk

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What do you call a kid with leukemia and no arms? Names.

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What funny about AIDS nothing its a terrible disease

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His name is Frosted Mike, and he neither has nor does not have a penis.

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knock knock come in !

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How do you drown a blonde? Intentionally attempting to drown anyone, regardless of their hair color, is murder which is illegal and morally wrong to do.

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What come after 69? Time for you to get a watch

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Why did the prestigious college accept the Native American student? Trick question, Native Americans don't exist anymore.

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How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

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What did the coconut say to the lizard? Nothing, the coconut fell off the tree and killed the lizard.

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You want some cake? Sure! Okay, go buy the ingridients and bake me some. YAY!

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What stinks of shit and has money. Smelly Mc Dee I lied about the money.

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How do you spell orange? O-R-A-N-G-E-U-D-U-M-B-A-S-S

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How do you kill and red head? Throw your mom at them!

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Whats worse than one bee? Two bees. Whats worse than two bees? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bees.

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A man goes into a butcher shop and says, "I bet you 350 euro that you can't reach that bit of meat," indicating a cut of beef hanging above him. The butcher looks up and says, "No way." The man says, "Why not?" And the butcher answers, "I have a huge gambling addiction, after losing my family to it, this job is all I have left" The man leaves, ruing the silly bet he had placed.

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Why was the asian a bad driver? Because while he was driving a leprechaun was punching him in the face.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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Wha....You probably shouldnt read the rest of this because i lie a lot (This joke deserves lots of thumbs and comments!)

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Why did little Lynn fall of her bike? Because she has no legs.

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Why did Jerry Sandusky rape little boys? Because his penis was hard and he needed to get his nut off quick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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