What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

What is black and blue and red all over? A woman that just learned a valuable lesson.

a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse does not say anything because its a horse and horses cannot talk.

Knock knock who's threre me, I kill you

How do you make Jacob cry? Take away his xbox

Why did the chicken cross the road? he has an iq of 5 like all chickens

Why was the road crossed by the chicken? Because as an animal, incapable of understanding human languages and consequently lacking in education, it was unable to understand the convention of not using the passive voice in English prose writing.

when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

How you know when dislextic

what did the cashier do when a Mexican robbed the store? call the police

What do you call a car with no wheels? Trash

What do you call an arab with a beard? How cares what his name is just shoot him!

Haunnaka in 1940's Germany. six thousand people die. in one minute.

Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

How much does Michael Vick love his dogs? More than Casey Anthony loved her daughter.

Why couldn't Jimmy eat his food? Because I threw a microwave at him

If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern p.o.r.n-o collections.

Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

EVERYONE TEXT 513-550-3742 AND ASK HIM WHY HE HAS GOOP IN HIS PANTS. his names eric

how do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The fridge is on its side, the door is torn off, and the ruined food scattered all over the floor. Not to mention there is an elephant in your kitchen.

Everything makes me look good, Rape doesn't look good on anyone, and it hurts everyone involved

Man#1: Who's John? Man#2: John is John. Who else do you want him to be? Why do you ask stupid questions? Are you naturally this dumb? Do you like the questions I ask? Man#1: (Turns away as he is deeply offended by the man who rudely answered his question.)

What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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