Why can't Helen Keller just kidding she's dead

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

thumb_up thumb_down

why was the 6 year old boy crying? his mother had just passed away from terminal cancer and his stepdad caught him crying so he kicke hm in the face and told him to man up.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but an orange gourd. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupter. Interrupter who? Interrupter Jones.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's white and black and red all over A nun with a spear throug her head

thumb_up thumb_down

If John has 10 packs of beer and he drinks 8 packs,what is John left with? Morbid Obesity.

thumb_up thumb_down

Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

thumb_up thumb_down

A man and a six year old boy are walking along a path through the woods on a moonless night. "Gee mister, I'm scared!" says the boy. "You're scared?" says the man. "I have to walk back alone!"

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down

y was John so sad becaus his mom took his phone

thumb_up thumb_down

Jemal picks 3 apples. He eats two of them, and then picks 3 more. What color was Jamal?

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

thumb_up thumb_down

a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken cross the road? An obsession with what motivates a chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Yo Mama's so fat that she is at risk for diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the women get after valentines day? An abortion.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the red bag have written on it? Yellow bag

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was the blonde walking funny? She had a ten foot long metal bar shoved up her butt, and it was very painful to walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man did not like this site

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops