Your mum is so fat, she has a larger bmi than someone with a healthy bmi

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I met a man today. His name was John.

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Whats worst then the Holocaust? Two holocaust's.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Jumping out of an airplane without a parachute is a once in a lifetime expeirence.

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9/11 was a shocking time for all of us.

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How you make a duck cry? Raping it. How you make it shut up? Killing it. Why did no one helped the duck? Because the duck has no friends.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. Yes dyslexic people drink too.

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87

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Why did suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms.

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Why did the snowman melt? It got tired of everyday life and decided that it would be best if he disappeared from society... His name was Dave...

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whats the same about a turtle and another turtle? they both seem to like lettuce

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once there was a man named steve. he happily sniffs pot every day after work. especially on sundays. one day, his family finds him sniffing pot. they are disgusted and disappointed in his bad decisions. so they join him

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What did the dog do when it raised its leg? It peed.

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Your mother is so fat, that she's working really hard to get back in shape so that she can support her family.

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up

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69

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what is the worst thing in the galaxy? runing out of dr.pepper :(

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One, it's just a lightbulb

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A gay guy walks into a bar. Nothing is said to him, because homosexuality is accepted in this area.

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What is the hardest part of a vegtable? The wheel chair 0.o

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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