What's a black man that drives a bus? A bus-driver

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What does and elephant and me have in common. Everything, I am an elephant.

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What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

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children are much like potatoes. when you eat them, they die.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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What did Hitler get his son for Christmas? An Ez-bake oven and a GI Jew

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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haha women's rights.....what a joke.

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whats flat and useless? the walls of an abandoned house where land prices are increasing and properties are in high demand

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What did the the water hose say to the man? Nothing, but the sight of water made the man thirsty and he drank to excess and died from dilution of his blood.

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A Mayor accidently killed one of the citizens of his town through dangerous driving. He could not be charged with murder, as it was an accident, but there was an uproar, and he was humiliated beyond question and forced out of office straight away. Even his family rejected him, owing to the fact that the unfortunate citizen he struck was his son's girlfriend.

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

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white or wheat? wheat please.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And so are you But the roses have wiltered The violets are dead The sugar bowl is empty And so is your head

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how do stick a dead baby into a blender and why???????? feet first so u can see the reaction on top.

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How do you stop a baby falling down a well? Throw a javelin through its forehead.

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What's better than finding Jesus in your room? Finding Chuck Norris in your bed.

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Why did the girl talk to her computer? Because she was Skyping with some faraway friends. Why were her friends far away? She was sent to the moon. Why was she sent to the moon? Because she tried to create eternal night.

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awkward moment when someone pretends to be Mr. Bear and stuffs up his own joke

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how many dumbasses does it take to make a kushagra

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Q: What are the best kind of jokes? A: The funny ones.

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What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

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You can lead a horse to water, but you can't suck its dick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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