A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share private information with a stranger.

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What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

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An Irishman and his sheep are locked in a barn together for 3 days. On the 3rd day his wife finally notices that he is gone, and comes looking in the barn for her husband. She liberates him, cooks him dinner, and they both laugh at the bestiality that occurred in the barn. 3 days is indeed a long time for anyone to endure.

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Why did the skeleton not go to the party? Because without the aid of various ligaments and muscles that would be attached to the average human being's skeleton, he was not able to move himself so much as an inch.

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Well, its allright then, just tired that is all, leave it be, I mean what if your wife sees it? What will she think?

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What is the difference between a person with Alzheimer's and Aids? 24!

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Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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how many people does it take to change a light bulb....... none..................its stilll bright

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An alien spacecraft picks up human transmissions from Earth. They continue on in silence and disgust.

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what starts with f and ends with c k....???? FIRETRUCK

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How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

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Why do we have brown eggs? Because black people have sex with chickens

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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a black man pays his child support

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What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

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I dunno, I dont grade love, I want to see you, touch you, bang you (sorry for not having the guts to use a nicer word, but I am tired and that is what I have in me now) And while that makes me sound like some hippy, I am very fucking picky about who I spend time with, and when. And I got no male friends, waste of time, why spend time with guys when I can spend time with chicks. Excuse me, just need my meds, speaking of sincerity, yeah I use medications, wont tell you what, but its well, not for my "mental disorders" I was born crazy, and I am going to die like I live: INSANE.

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

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Who do u talk to when everyone is ignoring you? Nobody will talk to you so what's the point?

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How many dead babies can you fit in an oven? Depends on if you put them in the blender first.

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What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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