Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

thumb_up thumb_down -34

why are some people black? Because god decided there needs to be different people in the world therefore none are congruent

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What is my name? I dont know

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What is the opposite of pro? Con right? So what's the opposite of progress? Congress

thumb_up thumb_down -36

like if your cool

thumb_up thumb_down -36

there's a new drink out called the Bin Laden... it consists of two shots and a splash of water

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Q: A man walked into a bar and said, "Ouch!" Why? A: The man walked into a METAL bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

knock knock? who's there? ivan ivan who? ivan. i want you to apologize for tooking their jobs the other day i said ivan who? i dont have a middle or last name

thumb_up thumb_down -38

A man walked into a bar. He was treated at the local hospital with a minor contusion.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Yo mama so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Why did the chicken cross the road? it doesn't matter, it got turned into KFC before it crossed.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

my parents let me say words that start with sh and end in it. shit what else could it be

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Three black guys go to the mall, they proceed to have a grand time!

thumb_up thumb_down -42

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Oh my gosh a talking muffin.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Why was the trucker making noises? It was having sex with someone

thumb_up thumb_down -52

What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

thumb_up thumb_down +35

This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops