Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are white And Pansies hold hands and skip

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The horse walks into the bar and the bartender says, "why the long face?" the horse looks at him and says, "my wife just died."

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Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house? She didn't either.

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knock knock - whos there whos there -"im confused" try it on someone

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So a dog walks into a bar.. well thats not true as most bars do not allow dogs.. oh..sorry.

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wow, that guy is such a buzz-kill. worse than Buzz Killington!

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Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

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A guy walks into a bar- he walks out of the bar because the beer was expensive and he didn't feel like getting drunk.

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Seriosly. too much sex again?

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A guy named M.C. walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "wheres the food?" The bartender says, " its in your stomach."

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A man saw a dinosaur yesterday. He had a very nice time at the museum.

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Rebecca Black's career.

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YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

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What's funny about Magic Johnson's T-Cell count? Nothing. He has AIDS, and it's a degenerative disease, that will eventually result in death. There's nothing funny about that.

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Q: Why is it when geese fly in a V that one side is longer than the other? A: There are more geese on that side.

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Urban ghettos

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Did you hear about the black kid that had a gun? Yeah, it's a.20 gage that his father bought him for Christmas so that he could go hunting together

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bite me

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"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

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Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

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Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

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Roses are red violets are blue monkeys like you belong in the zoo but don't be afraid I'll be there to that in the cage but laughing at you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops