A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

Person: hey buddy have you heard the greteat news Freind: yea you have aids Person: no my wife jusr became a pristatue an she had ten patients already i was her first

Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

A man walks into a bar with a chicken on his head the bartender asks the man why do you have a chicken on your head the man replies the chicken is thirsty

What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

Dude man, I'm high...

What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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