I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

Why was the little boy reluctant to approach his father? Because his father was a rotting corpse.

Knock, Knock Who's there? Knock, Knock Knock, Knock who? Knock, Knock

How do you drown a blonde? Intentionally attempting to drown anyone, regardless of their hair color, is murder which is illegal and morally wrong to do.

what do eagles and moles have in common? they both live underground except for the eagle!

Why did man lay down? His dog ate his genitals.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

Your momma's so stupid, she has a lower than average IQ!

a black man pays his child support

Did you know that if you write "Beatles" on a piece of paper, chop it up, put it in some cabbage soup, eat the soup, poop it out in a cup, and put the paper back together, it spells "Ringo <3 Arby's"?

What do you get if you put 2 Korea, 2 Europeans and 2 North Americans together? TSM

What's blue and smells? A dead girl guide.

A boy asks his teacher for a eraser....he was given a blue pen. Turns out he was in space.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had heard this joke so many times that it drove him so mad that he grabbed an ice cream, stepped into the road, and was hit by a bus, purposely adding an ironic effect to his death.

Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

What did the boy reading a book do?  Well, studies show that reading connects the synapses in the human brain, thus, making said boy reading the book a tad bit smarter.

Yo mamma is so fat that she can fit through a skinny doorway. Actually, yo mamma isn't fat at all, but rather a normal sized woman secure in her weight.

What's funnier than my jokes? your face.

What's red and has four letters? A stop sign

how does bob marley like his doughnuts? Sugared

whats the difference between kids and jewish people? kids come home from summer camp

What's worse then a missed call from your dad? A missed call from your mom.

How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man in a gorilla suit with a banana.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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