Two Scientologists walk into a bar. For $5,000 you can hear the rest of this joke.

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What is an offensive way to refer to black people from the time of the Flint Stones? Niggers

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Which of the following is the reason the Titanic sunk. Select all that apply. A. Iceberg B. No radar C. Late warning D. Put your hands on me Jack E. This ship can't sink F. Over by the bed, the couch G. God himself can't sink this ship Z. All the above X. None of the above Q. Why are you still reading

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What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

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a gay man walks into a bar the bartender says "what'll it be today" he asks for a beer the bartender comes back with a beer because thats what he asked for.

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What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

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what did the mexican do yesterday? bang your mom

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"Knock Knock" "Just ring the bloody bell for once!"

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What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had very recentley made his escape from a nearby farm, of which was owned by a man close to dying of a Rhabdoid Tumor. His family was in mourn.

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Man #1:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: I don't know Man #1: Because he died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Because he died? Man #1: Yep. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Really? Come on, I've already answered your stupid question. Man #1: JUST ANSWER! Man #2: Fine, because he died. Man #1: No, peer pressure. Duh. Man #2 promplty punches Man #1 in the face and continues about his buisness.

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why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What did the coin said when it got flipped ? Nothing, coins do not have sufficient requirements to be able to talk like we humans do.

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Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

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What did the empty bar stool say to the one next to him? "You look like you have a lot on your shoulders!"

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Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

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What do you call a person who kills there own child? Casey Anthony.

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Knock Knock Who's There Fat white lady with dreadlocks Fat white lady with dreadlocks who? want to buy some girls scout cookies?

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How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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In Soviet Russia you don't drive car, because the Soviet Union was disbanded in 1991

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If i wanted your 2 cents i'd rob you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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