What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? Pants.

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Why did the little boy fall down the stairs? I pushed 'em.

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Why is the sky blue? Time to get a watch.

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Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

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How do you beat Princess Diana in a car race? Challenge Princess Diana to a car race.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

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A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

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What do you call a successful black man who owns millions? Either a criminal or a fictional character.

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What do you call a girl who has slept with five guys? Her name.

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What the difference between a ferarri and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage. That would be murder.

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Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

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It's bright in here *puts on? sunglasses* Ahhh, that's better...

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We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

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why did the black child cry? strange men cut his penis off

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What's worse than catching aids? - already having aids.

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Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

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roses are red violets are blue start sucking my dick or ill kill you

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Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

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Why was the pedophile in jail? For indecent exposure to a child.

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My cake is yummy, It's icing is blue. It will always be mine, Come close and I'll punch you. So stay away from it And you will be safe, But if you dont listen, Prepare ice for your face!

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the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

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Q:Why does poop stink? A: it comes from butts.

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Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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