What's nappy,brown,intoxicated,and stealing my bike? A Blazed, black guy that stole my bike.

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Q: What drug did the addict do at the Grand Canyon? A: None; after years of battling substance abuse, he came to realize the social, financial, and health consequences had significantly degraded his quality of life, and was appalled by his bad decisions.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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A man walks into a shop and picks up some items for his party. He walks out of the shop without paying for the items. The police are promptly called and the man receives a 4 year sentence in prison for shoplifting.

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There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

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what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

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What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

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whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was very scary.

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What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

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So there was this kid who was sitting on a stool, and the stool started moving. He then realized that stools do not move, so he got up and ran away as quickly as he could.

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how do you make kindergarteners unhappy? you taze them.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dead one.

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How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

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An anti-Semite, a Jew and an American walked into the bar. The barman said: "Hi, Sara".

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It escaped.

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Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

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What noise does a Chinese roller coaster make? Chink Chink Chink Chink chink.....

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Joey: hey bobby who you talking to? Bobby: oh yeah I forgot to tell you your mom died.

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What is the weirdest way to get AIDS Having Sex

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I would tell you a joke about a blunt pencil but it's pointless

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How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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what do call a girl with a waterslide nose? Ava Sherman

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops