Why did the mushroom go to the party? Cause he was invited.

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How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

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Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

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Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

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Why couldn't the little boy tie his shoes? He had no arms

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Death by kayak

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Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

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What did the tractor say to the farmer? Nothing, tractors don't talk

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What animal was two legs and bleeds a lot? half a dog

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How many mentally challenged beings does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well one couldn't do it so adding more to the equation will only make it worse sir.

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Q Why did the chicken cross the road A Nobody knows why because nobody is psych

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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Why did a girl get an STD? She had sex.

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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What do you call a bunch of white men sitting on a bench? The NBA.

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why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died.

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A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

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Why don't you make like a tree, and get out of here.

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Who jumps the highest in basketball? The mascot because he has a trampoline.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im really bad at poetry Your mums a whore

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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