Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

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how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

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What's the difference between a tree and a lamp? One is a tree, one is a lamp.

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A man walks into a bar............. The bar explodes and everyone dies

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What do joe greene and joe biden have in common? Their first name

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You wanna hear what's totally out of this world? The moon

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Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

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Why was the pizza mad? Because he was going thorough a growth spurt and the testosterone got to him.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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How do prevent a nun from walking through a revolving door? Put a spear through her head.

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What did the star say to the asteroid? Nothing, astral bodies can't talk, you dipshit.

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What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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Why did you mom shop at Wal-Mart? She had a coupon

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When the going gets tough... Commit suicide.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

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How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it ran away and it's coop was on the other side of the road

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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What's harder than breaking up with your girlfriend? A stone.

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Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops