how did the black guy get into school? he walked thru the front door.

Justing Bieber walks in a bar. Everyone shoots him.

123 f*ck off

Why did the Squirrel swim across the river upside down? To keep its nuts dry.

hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

Q: Why did princess Diana crops the road? A: Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt

What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

Why was Luke named Luke Skywalker? Because he walks to skies.

Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

the bully said, you're just small fries. the fries couldn't help it someone ordered a small!

Why did the chicken cross the road? An obsession with what motivates a chicken.

The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

I'm schizophrenic and so am I. I also happen suffer from multiple personality disorder. Schizophrenia refers to separation of mental functions, manifesting in anti-social behavior and delusions, and is unrelated to the separate disorder of dissociative identity disorder, popularly known as multiple personality disorder, characterized by at least two distinct and enduring identities and dissociated personality states. Both are crippling to normal behavior and function due to lack of public awareness and funding. Now get out of our ghost train or we'll cut you.

Q:Whats yellow and white and sits at the bottom of a pool? A: A baby with slashed floaties Q:Whats red and gory and sits at the top of a pool? A: Floaties with a slahed baby

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Q: Whats the difference between a trash can full of dead babies, and a porch? A: A porch isnt in my garage.

A man walks into a bar. After recovering, he sues the bar for it's irregular glass doors.

What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

A black man and a Mexican man are in the back of a car. Who's driving? Not enough information to answer this question.

SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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