Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

How do you get Sally of the swing? Throw a clown at her.

What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

Why isn't Juley at school today? Oh Her father chopped off her arms and legs, gagged her, ripped out both eyes and threw her in a lake tied to cinderblocks!

What happened to the homeless man at midnight? He took a shit on the ground

What happens when you give a guinea pig a cherry? He turns into satan.

Q: Whats worst than the Holocaust A: If a second Holocaust happened, and then you found an apple in your apple

Hickory dickory dock, The mouse ran up the clock, Barbara called the exterminator, Who killed all 10 of them.

when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

A brunette, a blond and a red-head decide to go swimming in a lake. To prepare, they go shopping together to get some new bikinis. When they get to the shop they are pleased to find that the bikinis are on sale and they get them 50% off. They drive with their new swimwear to the lake and get changed in the changing room. When they get out they notice that it is quite cold. They decide to go swimming anyway. They notice that the lake is dirty. They decide to go swimming anyway. They notice the lake is actually a spill of oil. They decide to go swimming anyway. They remember that none of them can swim. They decide to go swimming anyway. They jump in. They drown.

why did rosa parks get moved to the back of the bus? she didnt call shotgun

What do you get when you cross a leopard and Chuck Norris? I don't know. Probably something like a furry yellow Chuck Norris with black spots and sharp teeth.

What's Black,White and red all over? A black person with a skin disease on her period.

3 guys get stuck in a island and find indians and the indians say the three guys have to stick 10 of the same fruits up there or they die. The first guy came back with oranges but stops at 3 then gets killed. the second had grapes and stop at 2 and gets killed. But in heaven the first guy ask why did you stop at 2 there grapes. the second guy said he saw the third with a pineapple.

Why do so many black athletes drive black cadillac escalades? Because it's roomy and they deserve to reward themselves after they put in so much hard work trying to be the best player they can be.

Hello, can I order a cheeseburger?

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Oh, I thought you could tell me. I will ask someone else. See you later.

I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

roses are red vilotes are blue i thought i was bent but then i met you

Walt disney Walks Into A Bar, The Bartender says "WOAH ITS WALT DISNEY!"

Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

Nazi jokes are not funny. ANNE FRANKly they're mean! See What i did there?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...