An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless your father is a doctor and you live with him.

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How do you know if you have athlete's foot? You ask your doctor, and he will tell you.

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Roger D. ASS , stops, has a ponder , and walks out of a s.t.i clinic ,without being seen

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Q: how do you get a clown off a swing? A: You hit it with a axe

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What did the toy cowboy say to the man? Nothing, toys can't talk.

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why did they plain crash? cause of gravity stupid

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What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

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8

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Knock Knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Just kidding, it's Danny. Oh okay, come in.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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What's windy and sunny at the same time? The weather.

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What do you call someone who explores wild cave systems? A spelunker.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

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whats red round and gets smaller? a baby combing its hair with a potatoe peeler

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What were the murderer's last words before he was put to death by electric chair? "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH NNNNNFHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.................................................................................................................." He then defecated in his pants.

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Once upon a time there lived 3 polar bears; a mummy polar bear, a daddy polar bear and a baby polar bear. Ond day the baby polar bear said to the daddy polar bear "I don't feel like a polar bear, I'm cold!" and the daddy polar bear said "You look like a polar bear."

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Q: Whats Worse Than 21 Dead Babies in a Trashbag? A: 1 Dead Baby In 21 Trashbags.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

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OMG SOHPIE IS SOOOOO GREAT AT BLOWING Josh Brown xoxo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops