What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

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Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

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Q: How do you make Kobie Bryant cry? A: Kill his family.

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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What did the Muslim say to the Jew? Nothing, as he has been deaf since birth and is incapable of forming coherent speech.

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what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

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When life gives you a hamburger, you know you're at Mr. Life's Hamburger Stand on 8th Avenue.

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How does a dyslexic person read the word 'schitzophrenia'? Schitzophrenia. I leid abuot teh dyslxeia.

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So, what happens when Germany attacks France? France proceeds to slaughter the attackers mercilessly, as it was during the Feudal Ages, a time when France was Europe's superpower.

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Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

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Q: How do you make a plumber sad A: you kill his family lolololololololololol

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What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

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A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

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school homewrok

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That was totally mean! I mean I was in no way going to say any of that to you! Especially not the last part, sorry that must have been part of the suggestion or something, I barely ever tell myself stuff like that, I mean stop it okay? I mean I totally read it and all but I was all like "I am notnot typing that" please stop it, its humiliating.

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The only positive thing in my life, is the HIV test! Lymmel

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How do you make a baby understand what you want? You color yourself purple, wear a yellow shirt, and do cart wheels while singing "The wheels on the bus go 'round and 'round!"

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I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

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Joseph Coney could die... or worse... he could do anything but that....

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Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

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A jew walked out of a bar then goes to the other bar across the street then walks out from the back door to go to another bar The Actions of this jew tells us that there are only 3 bars in the zone and one pet shop

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are you MC Donald's because I'm lovin' it!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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