Q: How do you make a plumber sad A: you kill his family lolololololololololol

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What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

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What do you call a black woman that's blind and has 1 leg? Handicapped

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hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

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what did the food critic say when he was handed a snickers? I'm allergic to peanut butter

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The only positive thing in my life, is the HIV test! Lymmel

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What is worse than the holocaust paying taxes

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Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

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Why didn't the boy have any pockets on? He didn't have any pants on

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Hey, you know what would be funny? A joke.

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How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

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2 doctors are talking to each other: -Dead? -Dead.

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I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket. He said: "Hey, I wonder how far I can kick this bucket."

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rodents are bed violents are glue i have lysdexia and short attention spa

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Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

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Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

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If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

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What's a Gigawat? I made it up.

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Bob: Do you know the difference between beer and women? John: No Bob: Oh

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Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

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How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

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That was totally mean! I mean I was in no way going to say any of that to you! Especially not the last part, sorry that must have been part of the suggestion or something, I barely ever tell myself stuff like that, I mean stop it okay? I mean I totally read it and all but I was all like "I am notnot typing that" please stop it, its humiliating.

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Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

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What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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