How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

What do you call a guy with a rainbow tuxedo on? A classy man that is very well dressed

Why did mallisa get to go to the bar instead of jeremy... jeremy has prostate cancer and he needs to be examined every 2 1/2 minuites plus he's 7 years old.

How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability

What did the little boy say to Micheal Jackson? Shouldn't you be dead?

Why was the cat meowing at the chicken? Because Sally got hit by a fridge.

How are this and that alike? They aren't.

Knock knock. Who's there. To get to the other side.

What do you get when you cross a rhino and a whale? Comment your answer:

If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

Once upon a time, in a magical kingdom, there were too many similar jokes on anti-joke.com. One man thought he could be funny by writing a joke that referenced this, and be even funnier by referencing what he was referencing. Then he referenced that, then that, and so on until the layers of meta caused his brain to explode. Some of it landed in your mother's vagina.

Why was the boat red and sticky? A boy dropped his slurpee. What were you thinking?!

how many dicks can you fit into mia khalifa's ass

Why did the black basketball team beat the white basketball team? They practiced more

Why did blonde drown? As a child a child she never learned to swim since she did not enjoy swimming.

Did you know that Claire Seiter likes to drinkapplseiter? No. Oh well she does..

Gregory: Hey, aren't you that pretty girl I saw from the party? Jenny: Huh? Gregory: No wait, it can't be you. Because you are WAY prettier. Jenny: Aw, that's so sweet, lemme give you my phone number. Gregory: Okay I'm ready to copy Jenny: It's 1-800-get-a-life-loser Gregory: Biitch

What is the sun's favorite day of the week? The sun is a mass of incadescent gas and cannot feel emotions; therefore, it cannot have a favorite day of the week.

what did the white singer say to the black rapper? I would like to do a song with you seeing as how we have 2 separate audience types i believe this would prove the song to be successful

Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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