I like my coffee like i like my women ... With big titys

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The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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A boy and his dad are in bed and his dad is telling him a story. And the cow told the farmer to get out of the bar. Now, what did the farmer say? Holy shit a talking cow!

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Miss Jones has 10 apples on her desk. Billy takes half of them away and runs. What does Miss Jones have? 5 apples and a complaint filed for smacking Billy with a ruler.

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roses are red violets are blue I lost my dog to typhoid it was an unfortunate case of bed luck

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The joke below me was written by someone who was mauled by a panther and raped by a tribe.

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what did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware river? Get in the boat.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A little boy falls into the mud Wanna hear a clean joke? He takes a bath with bubbles Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is Michal Jackson.

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How do you stop a black man from running? You shoot his knee caps.

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what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

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What do you do to Jewish people? You Challah at them.

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

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why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

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whatis worse then tripping over and landing head first in dog shit No alot

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because the amount of times people reused this joke on this site made her so annoyed much she wanted to hurt herself.

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What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

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Where was Suzy during the explosion? Everywhere! Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

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i once bought a timeshare, guess what happened? i'm broke

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If polar bears were pink they'd be very easy to find

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops