What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

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How do you make an onion cry? Onions are incapable of crying

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2 black guys, a colombian guy and a white girl are sitting at a bar. They are friends.

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Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

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Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

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What is big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

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Why did the man smell bad? He had not showered for several days

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when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

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Do you know what hurts? An abortion.

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What did 4 Year Old Jonny get for his birthday? Death.

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What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

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i'm an inbred jew - Barras

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Little Jimmy had walked in on his parents. "Mummy what are you doing with dad?" "Baking a cake" She replied. Two hours later the cake had then cooled and was consumed by all.

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My closet is like the wardrobe to Narnia, accept my closet isnt a portal into a magical world.

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Why did the washing machine laugh? Because it took the piss out of the knickers!!!!! :)

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Who cured cancer? Not God. What do you think of the almighty now?

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How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

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why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Damn, I was gonna do my laundry but Amanda Todd drank all my bleach

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Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Why did the woman stop running? She was an escaped convict that had been on the run for twelve years and the police had finally found the place where she was hidding. Upon arriving at her house she started to open fire on the three police cars, hit two cops and killed one more. The two are fine and are going through physical therapy as they were both hit in the spine and have a difficult time performing the smallest task. The one was one called billy. Billy had died in the hospital after asking if they had got her. He died believing a lie. They never got her. She is still on the run, I lied about her stopping.

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Why was the walrus wearing braces? It wasn't, because it his highly unlikely that people would care about a walrus's dental issues. The walrus would most likely cope with his irregular teeth and move on with its life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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