Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm Schizophrenic And so am I.

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What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

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Your mamma so jobless, that she needs a job! ~T.J.C.S.

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How do you kill a ninja? Shoot him with a sniper rifle from a building. How do you make sure he's dead? Shoot him twice.

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A coyote walks into a bar, because human development has rapidly destroyed his natural habitat. He mauls three patrons.

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Hello Braydon I am at home where are you?

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Hollywood today: If you Like Dragonball Evolution you are gonna love this. Peter Linkoff a 16 year old boy, is being chased by his half brother Jack Ganonbad as Peter Falls into a hole, which contains a cellphone... ...THE LINK TO PLANET ZELDA! There he discovers that he holds the Link between earth and Zelda, and just then planet Zelda is threatened by The Evil Master Sword! A Meteor so destructive, that it sheer force could destroy the entire universe! *Random scenes going by so fast that you cant make shit out of them begins* "PETER LINKOFF YOU ARE IN DANGER!" *BOOOOOOM*" "BUT WHAT IF HE IS NOT THE DELIVER OF THE BOOMERANG!" Iiiit is said... Thhaat heee that wields the lasergun known as the wooden sword...<

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Three children had stumbled upon a magic slide. There was a sign on the slide stating that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "JELLY" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of jelly when he reached the bottom of the slide. The next child, so excited to go down the slide began sliding down. She shouted out "LOLLIES" and sure enough she landed in a large pool of sweets and chocolates at the bottom of the slide. Finally, the youngest girl in the group mounted the slide. As she was going down she was enjoying the slide so much that she shouted "POOS POOS" forgetting the rule of the magic slide and finally landing in a large pool of excrement.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

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Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

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http://www.pollsb.com/photos/o/355988-gay_marriage.jpg

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Why did the legless person roll down a hill? Because he was in a wheelchair

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how do you make a plumber cry? pull up his pants....

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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Q: Why was the old man sad? A: Because he has a quarter super glued to the bottom of his foot

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Why didn't the cat play with the ball of yarn? It was drowned in a toilet.

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What do the Africans have for breakfast? Nothing.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, if you didn't know that, go back to school.

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What's good about sex with twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple Finding 2 worms in your apple

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What's the same between a grape and an airplane? they both have wings but the grape doesn't

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Your parents shouldn't have met. I was thinking that as I contemplated suicide.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a brick at him.

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Why can't hank swim? Hank is a rock.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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