Get up Look in the mirror

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what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

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Why did the monkey fall off? It had no more lives. Why did the second monkey fall off? I dunno. Why did the third monkey fall off? Since the second was unknown, the third does not exist. Why did the little girl died? It's pretty obvious.

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Whats the difference between Justin Bieber and Elton John? They're both gay.

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So there is a muslum, then he flew a plane into a building and died a sudden death. But he was wearing a helmet.

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I once was told that life is like a box of chocolates, but then realized that it wasn't

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Q: how do you get a clown off a swing? A: You hit it with a axe

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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Why did the catholic preist take all the little boys out in the woods? They were going on a camping trip.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a brick at him.

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Q: what's red and covers an elementary school wall? A: a red crayon

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why did the feminist cross the road? to suck a dick

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what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

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A Chinese man, an Italian man and a French man are sitting in a plane. They arrive in Los Angeles with a 23 minute delay due to atmospheric conditions

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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why did the blue berry cross the road

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So a crippled guy rolls into a bar..

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whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

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why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

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whats worse than finding a dead cat in your kitchen? a dead cat in your bedroom

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Q:What do you call a mexican witha clean record? A: Impossible

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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what did one computer say to the other .........

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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