A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

Wanna hear a joke? It's here somewhere You looked :D There ain't jokes on Antijoke.com

Why was the new born on the orphanage's doorstep? He was an accident.

What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

Two trees sit in a dark forest. Between them is a small hare. The wind blows hard and rustles the trees. The hare then looks up, and then forward. He hops away.

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice T!ts

why dose micheal jackson like 29 year olds Because there is 20 of them

How do you get a baby to be quiet? Put it in the oven for a few minutes

A Gamer walks into the tavern, the bartender says to him, "just dont act like you control the place!"

How big does your mouth have to be to eat a baby? How would i know, i'm not a canible.

Q. what did the hobo say to the rich guy A. nothing the hobo wa a mute

What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? We are both dinosaurs.

why did the monkey fall out of a tree?? a snail threw a refridgerator at him

Color Blind people are so stupid that they can't even see color. I've been seeing color since I was a small child. They are so stupid.

How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

Why did Jimmy's grandma never come home ? Her liver failed .

A black man is driving down the road in a van, and pulls up to a little a girl and says excuse me Miss. The girl replies Ok Ok I will get the car just dont hurt me The black guy says I dont want you to get in my van im taking your mom on a date.

What's the best way to make people notice you? Begin a cult that follows some crazy religious division and go on mass murdering sprees, looting, murdering, and raping everything that moves. Your prime targets should be schools, orphanages, and hospitals (maternity wards for bonus points). Eventually, walk up to the FBI unarmed and have them capture you. Then demand that you get interviewed, as you have instructed your followers that if you don't get to speak on public television, they will bomb multiple major cities. When they put you on TV, simply stare at the camera and say: "Senpai. The time has finally come for you to notice me." Then, because you are a cruel, heartless bastard with no morals whatsoever, have your men bomb the major cities anyway. Have fun!

What do you call a gay dinosaur? Megasoreass What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Lickalottapuss What dou you call a gay dinosaurs dog? Megasoreass Rex

Someone offers your friend one of two things he say's "choose witch one you want" your friends asks you and you say "if i were you, i'd be ugly"

Why did the Chicken cross the road? To get to Your House. Knock Knock. Who's there? The chicken

Two men walked into a bar. Only one came out. What happened? One Passed out.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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