Why was the boy holding his breath? A man was holding his head under water.

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What is blue and has blue shoes? A blue shoe box

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Why did the four friends drive past the bar? To see if it was too crowded to go into or not.

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A Quadriplegic walks into a bar.

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Guy 1: Why did Captain Hook die? Guy 2: Because he wiped his anus with a hook? Guy 1: No, because everyone dies.

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You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

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HA HA HA HA HAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHYHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA - Bomber

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Roses are red , violets are blue, you like 1d? STFU

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I ordered the "Anti-Joke" book Jk, waste of money

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for his birthday? A bike

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What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

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A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

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What's gay and Jewish? Henry Shine

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One day a there was a guy walking down the street. If you thought this was a joke, you're wrong.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Exercise

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why does the man appear fat he is

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Joseph Coney could die... or worse... he could do anything but that....

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a tree There isn't a tree in my garage

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road A: you are adopted

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Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

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What do you call a quadriplegic person in the water? One should refer to them by their name, but seeing as a quadriplegic person would be incapable of swimming if you do see a quadriplegic person in a body of water you should seek help or call emergency services.

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A Russian drinking something other than vodka.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Hurricane Irene.

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Everyone is different, but there are two of me, therefore I am unique. I have 72 different personalities, which all think, act and behave the same, all have my same name, but its still different to have such a thing eh? No I am not asking, I just added that weird little lightbulb symbol after "eh". People buy my book, its full of this nonsense... Its named "Are you left winged, or wrong winged" The book that has nothing to do with politics, and everything to do with politicians non existent sexlife! (seriously I had a book signing today... It was weird, people like stood in line twenty Signatures... AND PEOPLE ARE ALL GOING "HEY ARE YOU THAT GUY FROM HORSEHEAD?" Nero -WHO THE FUCK! IS THAT GUY ON HORSEHEAD?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops