How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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What's worse than a kid with a big head? Nothing you just look weird like Austin

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Rose are red Violets are blue all I what to know is what do that mouth do

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like if your cool

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Q. What's big, green, has four legs, fuzzy, and if fell out of a tree would kill you? A. A pool table

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knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

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haha

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And so he penguin said, The is my most casual outfit!" HAAAW

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yo mother is so fat, the recursive function computing her mass causes a stack overflow.

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roses are red violets are blue start sucking my dick or ill kill you

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womens rights

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What Sound does a baby make in a blender? I don't know I'm to busy masturbating to it

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Roses r red, Violets r blue, u think id eva cry ova u?? I told u i luvd u, n u believed it true... Well guess wat baby? U got played 2 B)

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Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. The stewardess calls secret service and has the man arrested.

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What did the tractor say when he lost his farmer? Where's my farmer??????

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Are we in Tennessee? Because I recently saw on the side of the road that it was 10 miles to Memphis.

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Why did the bakery run out of the business? They weren't making enough dough

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What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

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A man walked into a bar. He was treated at the local hospital with a minor contusion.

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knock knock who's there? john john who? john opens his mouth only to be gunned down by a terrorist attack

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Oracle horacle, you big bloated boracle!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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