What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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"Mommy! Look, I found a turtle!" "that's no turtle." "Oh..."

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Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

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whats better than nailing a baby to a wall? Ripping it off the wall.

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So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

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A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

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One man asked another man what his favorite sport was. The man replied: " My favorite sport is golf." "Golf requires no physical strength, therefore I do not count it as a sport." Said the man who asked the question.

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Why did Jenny fall off her bike? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Jenny

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What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

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Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

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Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

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When Michael Jackson was in a dark tunnel, it didn't work when he turned his flashlight. How come? A: Because it was out of battery

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Doctor! Doctor! Everyone seems to be stealing things! Piss off, I am a doctor not a detective you prick.

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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i know you talk the talk but can you talk the talk

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knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

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How do you get Jake snow to shut up? Say shut up

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RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

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THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

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Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was died...

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Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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