If Sally has 4 apples and Dan has 3 apples, how many apples do they have together? Red, because ducks have 2 legs.

why did the chicken cross the road? because he felt like it.

The mets are 3-0 this season

Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

What is yellow and sleeps alone? Yoko Ono.

Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

How do you act when you discover that the 'Submit' button doesn't work? Wait for a while until the problem fixes itself and you are able to perform the desired function.

Hello world

Why are african american people better than caucasian people at sports like basketball? Because african american people have more high-twitch muscle fibers. Which allow them to perform Explosion type movements better than caucasian people.

A man cheats on his wife and ruins his marriage of 24 years.

how do you make sure someone is dead shoot them

Yo' mama so retarded shes retarted!

Q: How do you stop a baby from spinning in circles? A: Nail his other hand to the floor

How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

What is the big difference between chopped pork and pea soup? One of them involves the killing of an intelligent animal and the other involves the harvesting of seeds from a non-sentient plant.

Why did the man burp? Because gases escaped from his stomach and came out of his mouth.

Whats the difference between a black guy and a retard? NOTHING!!!!!!

Acouple of grammer nazis walk into a bar & 'their' treated very poorly.

"I see" said the blind man to his dead wife

What did Niel Patrick Harris do after coming out of the closet? He grabbed his jacket and went for a delightful stroll in the park.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings

You're pretty... PRETTY UGLY

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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