Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

Try not to laugh at this joke... Knock knock Who's there? Ha ha ha Ha ha ha who? I told you not to laugh

Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his family!

my penis

What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

when chuck norris does a pushup, he is tearing the muscles in his biceps, deltoids, core, and triceps in order to make them stronger.

What's red and can't find a family? A fire hydrant

So these two guys walk into a bar... Well, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother a whore.

A horse walks into a bar. A chicken crosses the road. Humanity is no more. Nature reclaims the Earth.

What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? The extinction of the human species.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know what? SCREW YOU!

whats green and lives in the water

There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

I would tell you a joke about a blunt pencil but it's pointless

What do you get when you cross a gay man with a chainsaw? A decapitated homosexual.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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