What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it ran away and it's coop was on the other side of the road

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How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. There is a frog in his beer.

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1,000 people get out of a plane , who hits the ground first? The DEAD guy!!!!

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what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint

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Roses are red Violets are blue Hop in the van or I will rape you

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What's blue and can't read? The Pacific Ocean

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

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Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

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Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

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What did the farmer say to the cow that asked for food? No.

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Im about to rewrite History....... History

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

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You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

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What do you call a fridge painted red and brown? A fridge.

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What did the black man say when a blond walked into the bar? " Hi Molly"

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How about that airplane food? Ive never been on a plane you tell me

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Are you from Africa because YOU GOT AIDS

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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