Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the woman cross the road? Better yet, why is she out of the kitchen

thumb_up thumb_down +4

alex and clayton are having sex at school. at that point, their teacher walks in and tells clayton about the dangers of unprotected sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

how do you make kindergarteners unhappy? you taze them.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Whats white and goes up? a confused snowflake

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

So there was this kid who was sitting on a stool, and the stool started moving. He then realized that stools do not move, so he got up and ran away as quickly as he could.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what's the difference between a black man and a tricycle well the black man's a human

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dead one.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his family!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

there once was a man named china who got stuck in yo mamas vagina he escaped through her butthole minus her butt mole and then died a horrible and painful death

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was the dog barking? Because I lit him on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock Knock Jehovah's witnesses!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

thumb_up thumb_down +2

An anti-Semite, a Jew and an American walked into the bar. The barman said: "Hi, Sara".

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops