Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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How do you stop an asshole from being an asshole toward you? Shoot him in the head.

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A man drove up to a drive-thru. He ordered a coke, but the lady at the window spilled it on his lap. He promptly changed his clothes and accepted the lady's apology.

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What did Stevie Wonders wife do when they got into fights? Re-Arrange the furniture

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Q: How do you make an onion cry? A: You can't, it's an onion.

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

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What did the deaf girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was Jewish

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2 Scientists walk into a bar. The first one asks for H20, and the second one asks for H20 too. They both enjoy a refreshing glass of water.

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Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

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Why does the rabbit go in the hole? because that's where it lives.

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

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Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

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Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

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how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

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A man walks into a Library.... And asks for a book.

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A one legged man walks into a bar and falls down.

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kkkk

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What was the black guy doing in Mississippi? Just hanging around.

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Hurr durr, I shit my pants.

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When an anvil and a feather are dropped off a building the anvil will hit the ground first because it's heavy

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE HERE'S A KNIFE KILL YOURSELF KANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know? I'm not a chicken :/

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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