why did the black guy talk to the monkey? they were in the same cage.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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why was the boy sad his whole family just died in a plane crash

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was playing tic-tac-toe with a friend.

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit and. the bear eats the rabbit in a whole bite without chewing...end of story...the end

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An alcoholic walks into a bar. He wakes up the next morning in a jail cell covered in blood. 3rd time this week.

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Justin Beiber has fame, his own bodyguards, he has performed many shows and has everyone's attention. What do you have? A penis.

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A man died.

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What happened to the child who's mother drank and took drugs while she was pregnant? Dead.

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A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

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why did the plane crash ? Because a loaf of brad was flying it, and Loaves of bread don't fly planes

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Q. Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? A. Because he had alzheimer's and couldn't remember how to ride a bike.

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A man walks into a clothing store, he calls his wife, buys a shirt, and leaves.

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what is bad about being a black jew? you have to sit in the back of the oven

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Text Klarens at 317-653-8695. Tell him crazy shit or send crazy pictures.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana Yoshimoto. A popular Japanese author of the book, Kitchen. She is incredibly talented and it would be a great honor to have her in your house, so you should open your door.

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What do you do if a black man steals your flatscreen TV? Give up, he's probably in Mexico by now.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead get pulled over. The cop says "Yuck!" Then shoots the redhead because red hair is disgusting.

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BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR SHIT STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man in a gorilla suit with a banana.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sunflowers are yellow, Daises are white.

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Why was little Alice and her family at the graveyard? Well someone had to come at her funeral...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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