why did sarah have to do overtime at work? because i set her house on fire

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A Jew walks into a bar and says drinks are on me.

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Q. Why did the lady scream when she saw her husband? A. Because he was dead.

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A hooker walks into a bar. She orders a few drinks and leaves. She's a man.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your limbs scliced off with a chainsaw and being put in a cage to get mauled by a Mutant Man-eating horse.

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A blond, a brunet, and a red head jumped off a bridge. Which one hit the ground first? In order to solve this problem you would first need to figure out witch of the three had more of a body mass. Then you would need to calculate the accretion in case one brought along a cow. However, in the end the outcome is always the same: 3 dead bodies on impact and 3 mourning families.

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I like my wine like I like my children... Eight years old and locked in a cellar

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why did suzie fall of the swings? because she had no arms.

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What do you call a guy who likes men? Gay

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Why did the black man have a gun in his hand? He was crossing through a dangerous neighborhood and was offering protection to himself and his family.

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What's worse than a fly in your soup? Cancer.

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

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Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

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what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

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The feds ruined the first underground, so in order for this to not happen you joined them?

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What's sad about a truck passing behind a duck? A: Behind the Duck were the Ducklings.

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

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The teacher asked her class "What is 42 + 17?" Several hands were flung into the air. "71!" said Billy excitedly. "No, I'm sorry that is incorrect." said the teacher. "67!" shouted Carl at the top of his lungs. "Incorrect!" said the teacher. Then little Johnny raised his hand. "The answer is 69" he said full of intellectual delight. "Very good." said the teacher.

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A bus with 12 black guys is driven off a cliff. What is the sad part of this story? ... Our beloved president was not involved.

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Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

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Q: How did the man walk across the road? A: With his own 2 feet!

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What's blue and smells? A dead girl guide.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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A kid who lost parents is called an orphan and a wife who lost her husband is called a widow. What do you call parents who lost their child? Free on the Weekends.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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