So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

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Rush Limbaugh

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What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

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What's wrong with black people? They tend to make mistakes, as do all humans

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Dislike this joke for a cookie However if you like this joke you dont get a cookie

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Why are black people black? Because they're clearly not white.

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Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

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why did the chicken cross the road ? how else is he going to get to the other side

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What's worse than eating half a worm? Eating somebody's brain.

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That awkward moment when a sentence doesn't end the way you think it octopus.

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What is funnier than 24? If you think numbers are funny then you could have a mental illness and that isn't quite funny.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he is quite wealthy.

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How do you survive the zombie apocolypse? You avoid dieing or being mutated in the living dead.

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How do you make 5 lbs of fat look good? Draw a smiley face on it.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

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What is big, hard, and bushy? My Penis. I lied about it being bushy.

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Your mother is so fat that it became a problem affecting everyone close in her life. Her new year's resolution was to lose weight, and surprisingly, has become quite healthy since then.

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Jimmy comes home from school one day and goes to his mother. "Mommy, guess what?" "What?" "I had sex with my teacher today!" Naturally after hearing such news the mother gets appalled and tells her husband. "Well, that's my boy" he says "Now that your a man Jimmy we're going to go out and get some drinks tonight be ready in a half an hour." So they arrive at the local bar "Wait here son, you can sit down and save us a table and I'll go get the drinks ok?" "No dad I think I'll stand" "..why? What's the matter son?" "My butt hurts"

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Why did George smoke weed? Because he was depressed after his wife died and couldn't get over the fact that he would be lonely forevermore.

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Yo mamma so fat that when she gets in bed she gets sleepy

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

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What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

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What is a turkey? The offspring of a turtle and a monkey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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