Roses are Red Violets are Blue I just sharpened this hatchet Don't make me use it!

Grandpa loved a good joke, he died laughing. The doctor said it was a severe stroke probably brought on by smoking aggravated by high cholesterol and high blood pressure.

deez nuts

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Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

Thanks, I admire your sincerity, and I am happy to see that I got a lot more in common with you, than with well, my nerdy and geeky friends, which are not reading this here and now unless they are going against their orders and messing up their own work schedule. I just want you to know that I have fallen in love with you Nero, and if that is a problem for you, please let me know ASAP.

what happens when u fall down the stairs? you break your arm.

Just so you are warned here folks, some of the jokes down here are really nasty, like you know... Antijokes... But luckily you got my family friendly stories about sex, incest, panties, grenades, dripping Meows, yeah... Regular family show stuff... IT HAPPENS TO US ALL! Right? Please tell me right? Riiight? Right? Yes? Phew, okay, for a moment I actually thought you where gonna tell me I was normal...

what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

Why are some people so barbaric? Because some people are German.

Whats alive and drowning? your new born baby you just threw in the river

What smells like diarrhea and looks like poop? A rotten banana.

josh roberts makes nuns hang themselves

A priest and a rabbi walks into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says "is this some kind of joke?".

Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: Cheese.

Hey, you are competitive, but let me have the last word here and you will like it. If you keep poking your nose constantly, the effect will actually overlap, making it stronger and stronger, by all means though, make sure you keep some nose working alright?

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To mutilate the body of a Jewish girl that lay on the other side.

It's all shits and giggles until someone giggles and shits.

Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

Do you want to hear a joke? Well you can't because you are reading this

My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck.

I'd like to advertise the love of Jesus in Kobane. Do u join me next Monday? :D

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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