A man walks into a bar. He buys something.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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Q: Why was the old man sad? A: Because he has a quarter super glued to the bottom of his foot

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Q: Why do only 10% of women go to heaven? Your question is fundamentally wrong. Religion is a collective hallucination.

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Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

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whats worse than ur granny dying? uhhh...actually theres nothing is worse

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Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

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If there's something strange in your neighborhood. Who ya gonna call? The Police.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What is the definition of child abuse? Ms Bazan

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What makes us laugh? Definitely not this joke!

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Whats fluffy, multicolored, and dances like a disco santaclaus? i don't know.

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How many infants does it take to paint a house? Forty-Seven.

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I once was told that life is like a box of chocolates, but then realized that it wasn't

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a brick at him.

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Why did Chuck Norris eat a sandwich? Because he was hungry.

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Dear Six, Please stop spreading rumors about me and nine. I hear you two also do some pretty nasty things. Love, Seven.

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:y do people talk? ;idk :oh then nevermind

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Roses are red. I f***** a dude. you're a failed abortion. I never loved you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to

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What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

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How did the the the police know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head & shoulders in the glove compartment.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops